Judging and Bullying: Are They Different?

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What Do You See? What Do I See?

We see things as only we can, through the eyes of our experiences, our history, our values, our preferences and our biases.  Each person’s view is unique.  That uniqueness of view explains very neatly why we often have communication problems, misunderstandings and arguments.

Our “Lens” Changes as We Learn and Grow

Each person’s “lens” used to see and experience life is different and changes as we learn and grow.  As we learn and grow and travel, our world view expands until it can include more of the views of others. Even if we don’t fully agree with those views, we can see that each person has a unique view and the right to have that view respected by others.

What is Judging?

If each person’s view is different from the views of others, then what is judging?

  • A limited worldview that only allows the views of one person or group
  • Promoting one’s own thinking as the “perfection” of thinking
  • An attempt (intentional or not) to make ourselves look smarter by belittling another person or group
  • An attempt to control the behavior and thinking of others or groups

How is Judging Different From Bullying?

The better question is “How is judging the same as bullying?” Judging and bullying do have a lot in common.

  • Both rely on getting the upper hand at the expense of another
  • Both are unkind
  • Both are harmful
  • Both reflect a win-lose mentality
  • Both are absent in a healthy culture

Is judging nothing more than intellectual bullying?

 

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For more, see Linda’s book 7 Lenses and the 21 Question Assessment: How Current is My Message About Ethics?
 
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  2014 Axiom Business Book Award Winner 
  About 7 Lenses
 
 
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© 2011 Leading in Context LLC 

About Linda Fisher Thornton
Linda Fisher Thornton is Founder and CEO of Leading in Context, and author of the award-winning book 7 Lenses. She teaches as Adjunct Assoc. Prof. for University of Richmond SPCS. She is leading a movement to help leaders and organizations Unleash the Positive Power of Ethical Leadership.

4 Responses to Judging and Bullying: Are They Different?

  1. Sabeha says:

    Thanks for helping me out

  2. Sabeha – I’m so sorry that’s happening. There are things that you can do, and this website explains some strategies that may help: http://pbskids.org/itsmylife/friends/bullies/article4.html.
    This National Bullying Prevention Center also has more resources and they have a toll free number as well: http://www.pacer.org/bullying/?gclid=CP7jnPjBr64CFQPe4Aod8nz_QQ

  3. Sabeha says:

    I’m getting bullied by my best friend because she turned popular what should I do

  4. Pingback: MAPping Company Success

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